I just found out that my very close relationship for 4 years now might be over. High school sweetheart, VERY closer, her family loves me etc. we live close, inseperable. She has ALWAYS been into the country girl type lifestyle, always out of trouble, never to drink or party. Well her best friend was also dating my best friend. They just broke up a month ago. Lately she has been experimenting with alcahol behind my back (I knew about it though, she likes it and does it whether I like it or not) and seems to be liking it alot. All she wants to do is party now, our work schedules conflict pretty bad but we've always "found time for each other" and it has NEVER been a problem. Now she's been going out drinking and partying and **** these past 2 months. (I'm working, thats why I cant go with her)
Well her and her best friend are really close, and do everything together, and hang out with the same people etc. Well her best friend just cheated on my best friend with another guy. And honestly these past few weeks for the first time in 4 years I've felt a slight distrust towards her. I feel like she's not telling me everything, and all of a sudden we need time apart. She feels like she's holding me back from exploring new things. She still wants to date me and everything, but she wants to explore without me. I dont think she's seeing anyone else, but now I dont know what to think/believe. I've never considered cheating on her, or doing anything without her.
I dont know how anyone in the world could go through this, it HURTS so bad. It hurts so bad it makes me sick. Yes I cried, call me a pussy all you want. She just wants some space and time to explore, but she still wants to talk to me, she just doesnt want to see me. I can't beleive this.
I'm ASSuming it's over, but I can't imagine it being over. Everyday for the past 4 years I've called and talked to her, gone and seen her at night sneaking around, taken her in the truck and gone off, she comes and wakes me up after a late night. The other day she came over for sex like it was just to give it to me and leave. She came, she didnt even want to fool around, we seemed like we "got it over with" and she "had to go".
My buddy is just getting over his girl, I wonder if I should just try to get over mine and move on. I can't even beleive I'm typing these words. It does feel good to get it out. Always looking for opinions.